FOMO and other Hindrances
Last year, welcome week at Liberty drained me for the entire year.
Not only was I new to college itself, but Liberty provided so many parties, activities, and random meet and greets that I felt I needed to attend everything in order to have the 'correct' college experience.
The rest of the year didn't really slow down after that week.
Nearly every night my friends would go out, attend a sports game, or just gather in the common area to be with each other.
But I still stayed in my room.
I blamed my sudden introvert habits on my anxiety and lack of energy. But honestly, I was suffering from the fear of not being wanted or included.
What if I finally came out of my room and no one wanted to see me?
What if I went to that party, but I didn't know anyone?
What if they had all left because they didn't want to be with me?
My concerns were due to my overthinking and narcissist thoughts.
Something I learned very quickly was how little I mattered in the grand scheme of the world.
I has come from a small private school where everyone knew everything about everyone.
Exclusion and other forms of 'punishment' were the norm.
But that's not the case at my college with my friends. But I was too anxious to see that last year.
I think people get too in their heads and begin to question where they stand with others and if their presence in a group is really wanted. Everyone has felt unneeded at some point in their lives. But once you get out of your head and with your friends, the worries begin to melt away.
College isn't about doing everything or being everywhere. It's about community and being in the moment. No one really cares if you go to every event during welcome week or even throughout all your four years. You can miss a sport game or an outing every now and then- you are human and you're going to be tired or grumpy sometimes.
But when you get to thinking about college as revolving around you and how you're perceived, you miss the point of having fun and getting swept away in the moment.
I couldn't truly enjoy myself because I was so worried about other people's thoughts that didn't even exist.
God repeatedly tells us to live in every moment because they are artfully and carefully designed for us to enjoy.
"This is the day the Lord has made, We will rejoice and be glad in it"
The second we overanalyze the verse or debate if God is specifically talking about us in this exact moment, the meaning gets skewed and almost lost. God has made blessings and provisions in each moment of our lives. Whether they be a welcome party, a late night out with friends, or even a night spent doing face masks with your roommate.
However, God does not call us to be timid and anxious about the moments He has provided.
If you get home and your mom has made your favorite food for dinner, you don't immediately pick it apart- debating if it's poisoned or will cause you to gain ten pounds. You are grateful and you enjoy the meal.
In the grand scheme, every day is filled with so many blessings, our human minds can't comprehend or tally them all.
Yet, we still get caught up in the 'what if's' and the worries that are the Devil's way of stealing our joy. The blessing God has made for all of His children become a curse and a weight to us.
But living in the moment negates over thinking. Living in the moment means trusting that God has given you His best and has provided you with multiple blessings and reasons to celebrate.
Last year, I learned that my isolation was not a safeguard, but a hindrance to my happiness.
God wants what is best for us and enables us to go into the world with a heart full of the knowledge that we are over comers and the God of the Universe is on our side.